i just google imaged poop.
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Randomize
