where does the pee come out of this thing
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
Randomize
