UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
Randomize
