But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
Randomize
