I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
Randomize
