That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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