i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
I am full of burrito and curiosity
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
