wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Randomize