I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
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