is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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