So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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