i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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