Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
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