I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize