I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Randomize