Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
She tied me up with her honor cords...
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
pray to the hookup gods
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Randomize
