You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
Randomize
