Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
i barfeds in our rink
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
