Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
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