so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
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