Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize