just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
Randomize
