I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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