I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
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