Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
