youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Randomize
