Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
Randomize