ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
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