I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Randomize
