I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
Randomize
