Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Randomize
