I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
Randomize
