You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
Randomize
