i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
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