Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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