I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
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