Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
Randomize
