it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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