Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
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