I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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