no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Randomize
