you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
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