Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Randomize
