Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
Randomize
