Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize
