We tried having a conversation with our noses.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
