Your tits are I can't wait for
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
Boobs speak an international language.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
Randomize
