I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
you made out with another girl for some wings
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize
