Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
