Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
Randomize
