dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
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